May your past be the sound of your feet upon the ground. (‘Have You Seen This Man?’ Week 25)

(This blog is part of an ongoing weekly series on weight loss. At this point, you should have this figured out.)

So, I have a confession. I missed the Grammys last night. 

"But Brad…you just talked about how music is soooooo important to you a few weeks ago!”

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I have run, I have crawled, I have scaled these city walls. (‘Have You Seen This Man?’ Week 24)

(This blog is part of an ongoing weekly series on weight loss. At this point, you should have figured this out.)

So I totally let the cat out of the bag.

During the ‘big game’ on Sunday, you know…the one that ends the professional American football season? Why anyone can’t say Super Bowl is a testament to the moniker of No Fun League.

Anyway, I digress. During said game, the lights went out. And I don’t mean there was an outage at my house…I’m talking about forty minutes of hand-wringing in Nawlins.

The freaking power browned out during the Super Bowl. 

And so there was nothing to talk about except variants of ‘Infrastructure Fail.’

No comments about Ray Lewis’ cameo in the next Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles live action movie as The Shredder. 

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What makes a good man? (‘Have You Seen This Man?’ Week 23)

(This blog is part of an ongoing weekly series on weight loss.)

So, spoiler alert.

*deep breath*

I didn’t weigh in this week.

I have a good reason, I promise. 

As my alter-ego , the Headmaster at Superhero University, I was hosting a workshop all weekend for my good friend, Pat Fraley.

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I get my kicks above the waistline, sunshine. (‘Have You Seen This Man?’ Week 22)

(This blog is part of an ongoing weekly series on weight loss.)

Forty-four.

Down a pound. 

Half century closing in.

Time to shine.

Watch me.

Or don’t.

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Every night, and every day a little piece of you is falling away. (‘Have You Seen This Man?’ Week 21)

(This blog is part of an ongoing weekly series on weight loss.)

Music is incredibly important to me.

I grabbed a mic and sang in my Underoos when I was three.

I sang my guts out in high school.

Switched to opera in college. Still rocked out a lot.

Started listening to so much different stuff that I could fit in to any crowd. Or none, if you asked some.

Eclectic doesn’t even scratch my skin.

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It’s just a jump to the left… (‘Have You Seen This Man?’ Weeks 18, 19, & 20)

(This blog is part of an ongoing weekly series on weight loss.)

…and a step to the ri-i-i-i-i-ight!

That, my friends, is a little gem out of counterculture heaven. It also describes the last three weeks of the journey. 

"Holy shit, Brad…where have you been?"

I thank you for noticing. No, I had a nice little ‘I’m going on hiatus for the holiday’ message all ready to go, and saved it as a draft rather than post it. 

Fail.

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La-la how the life goes on. (‘Have You Seen This Man?’ Week 17)

(This blog is part of an ongoing weekly series on weight loss.)

Remember the alleged Chinese curse? 

May we all live in interesting times. That’s putting it mildly.

It’s tough to write today. I don’t feel any snark, references to the end of the Mayan calendar, or Jeff Dunham-style arguments with myself coming on. It’s tough to write anything that resembles my normal foot-stamping.

So I’m not.

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I might have left it on the counter, maybe outside in the car… (‘Have You Seen This Man?’ Weeks 15 & 16)

(This blog is part of an ongoing weekly series on weight loss.)

So. 

Yeah.

In the fourth or fifth ending (I forget which) of “The Lord of the Rings,” Sam Gamgee opens the door to his home. And after the life-changing and defining adventure of the previous months (and for us, nine to thirteen hours, depending on which version you watched), he gives a small glance around and says, “well, I’m back.”

So.

So what? Look around already!

Well, I’m back.

Did you miss me? 

Did you even notice I was gone?

Be honest; you didn’t even realize that I didn’t check in with you all last week, did you?

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I came in here for the special offer, a guaranteed personality…and it’s not here, it disappear. (‘Have You Seen This Man?’ Week 14)

(This blog is part of an ongoing weekly series on weight loss.)

What a week. Two corners of the Bermuda Triangle successfully traversed. 

It was a week of firsts.

First time we hosted Thanksgiving.

First Thanksgiving spent in Dallas.

First Thanksgiving with my in-laws.

First time both families were in the same place since our wedding.

First two games of Settlers of Catan ever (and first two butt-kickings dealt).

First Thanksgiving that we put together the entire menu.

…and most memorably, first Black Friday in Dallas.

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Everybody’s watching you now. (‘Have You Seen This Man?’ Week 13)

(This blog is part of an ongoing weekly series on weight loss.)

Well, that time of year is upon us. Many in my situation in life call it the Bermuda Triangle. 

No, I’m not going on an ill-fated three-hour tour or anything.

I’m talking about the Bermuda Triangle of Weight Loss. The holidays of Halloween, Thanksgiving, and Christmas*.

* Disclaimer VO: Or whatever December holiday you celebrate, and as another sidebar I refuse to use the word ‘observe’ because I can observe the holiday without celebrating it and I choose to use Christmas because that’s what I celebrate and we’re all adults here so you know I’m using the holidays as a signpost with no other real significance and it’s also my sandbox and if you don’t think I’m being inclusive enough then suck it and go look at pictures of cats sneezing or whatever time waster du jour is en vogue this quarter hour. Also neener neener.

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